Healing is a tough gig. It has ups and downs and comparisons and losing and winning and frayed thoughts. Today I felt I lost to the war of survivor life. I didn't have suicidal thoughts, but I had losing thoughs. It hurts. And that's the tough part of being on this journey of healing. I sought help, but I needed to set up an appointment with my psychotherapist. I couldn't talk to my old friends, because they no longer respond out of compassion fatigue. It's a hard journey. I will mend, but this was all I had in my head at this time. It will get better, and I will be better in this life.
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